Apples to Apples

So I have made the move across country. I have gotten my certification. I have started the job. It is a job I didn’t even want to interview for, but I reminded myself it is not easy to get into public school in IL and I had to go. I dragged myself down to the school that August morning and landed a job. I was going to teach 6th grade Language Arts and Social Studies…..to Special Ed. I know enough about myself to know that I have strength and patience, but just not enough for spec ed. I was told the students were mostly 4th grade level and ADHD - well, gees that doesn’t sound so spec ed to me. That’s what I was coming from. Then I started and saw what it really was. 

With half of the first quarter gone, I’m still not seeing the class I was told about in the interview. These students are all over the map in ability - from not even recognizing their own last name on a flashcard, to me wondering why they are even in my class to begin with. Now pile on the behavior disabilities, throw in two MMR students who stare at me blankly when asked the most basic of questions, and you’ve got my mix. I have my work cut out for me. It is the hardest job I’ve ever had.

Walking back from PE last week, I just wanted to crumble up and whine and whine and whine, then whine some more. I just had a little mental pity party and found myself saying that I am a 4th grade teacher stuck in a junior high. I feel completely trapped and dread going to school everyday. I count down the days between days off, hoping that reminding myself there is a small break coming will get me through that week.

Every morning I try to muster up the positive energy and smiles and every day by 10 they are gone. It is exhausting trying to pretend that I am happy at my new job. I can’t give up though. I couldn’t imagine the guilt and shame I would feel if my students could ever tell how I was feeling.

So I am finally going to get this site going and hopefully turning into what I hope it will.

I would love to see this be a place where educators gather to comment and help each other with the everyday struggles of our profession. I’ll post things I feel are helpful and we can share our stories and ideas.

So to start things off, I will tell you a little about my background and what I am doing now. I am from AZ. I went to school for Sociology and decided in my very last semester that I needed to be a teacher. I signed up for, and started, graduate school immediately after finishing my BA. I got my Master’s degree in Elementary Ed. I looked in to other programs, but the MA one was the fastest way to get certified. My first year I taught a 4th grade homeroom and 4th-8th grade PE and Science. It was awful.  I spent WAY too much of my own money and hated the school I worked for. Thankfully my students were AMAZING and I still keep in touch with a few of them. My second year I switched schools and taught a 3/4 combo class. This time the school was good, but the students were absolutely insane. The veteran teachers at my school assured me that this only happen every 15 years or so. I held on and taught those 3rd graders the following year as 4th graders. That was last year and by far my favorite teaching year. I feel like by year three I finally got a handle on all the separate responsibilities of a teacher.

Last year, I made a life decision to move across country. It took me just over 6 months to get my certificate in IL and land a job. It is not my ideal job, but it was this or Boy’s PE and I didn’t think I’d get that one!

Now, I am teaching a 6th grade Special Ed class at a junior high in a low income area. I don’t care for it that much, but I will write a separate post about that later.

So there it is. My teaching history and why I say the things I say when I write. I hope that you will share your points of view and tips on this site as well. The more teachers to help each other out, the better teachers we will all be.